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We live in a coupled world, and many people are so afraid of being alone that they don’t know to be alone. You never really know if you have chemistry until you meet.Yet when a single who enjoys being independent (regardless of how much she also wants a partner) wants to find a partner who is more reinforcing than that autonomy says that she’s having trouble finding a good match, the statistics come out. Maybe rather than telling singles they just need to try harder, should try harder to help them.Realize that they may want to go new places and try new things to meet people, but they’re uncomfortable doing it alone or can’t afford a regular babysitter.So offer to take a class with them or watch their kids while they go on a date.
After all, just because someone has a phobia of elevators because one malfunctioned while they were on board doesn’t mean they should be afraid of all elevators.
You were lucky enough to pick someone who ended up being a good (or at least tolerable) match for you.
Whatever revelations came after the “I Do”s were things you could live with.
(Unless you’re the sister of one of my students, who has had getting coffee with strangers. Add to that the fact that dating is time consuming.
When you have a busy job or children, for example, there may be barriers to going out with every potential match you meet.