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In other cases, I’ve seen profiles that have a 40-50% match with mine, but from the profile I can see pretty easily that they would be perfect with me – common sense of humor, common belief system, everything.So, I really don’t think it’s a proven science quite yet.Those messages made me run far, far away from online dating.In hindsight, I suppose if I had stayed active with it for a little longer MAYBE I would have encountered a “nice” guy.Eric has been using a couple of online dating websites off and on for the past year, with very little success.He spends time every day carefully browsing through profiles and looking for women who he feels share his same interests – beyond the dating site’s algorithm which promises to perform its own magic in matchmaking. I spent hours trying to create a profile that shows people what I’m really like. Sure, I get a lot of profile “views”, but no messages.Like, OKCupid gives you a percentage of match or non-match you are with certain people.
This experience is best exemplified by my close friend who I will call Eric.
The problem with online dating is that you can’t see the person’s face when they’re telling you about themselves. I think it’s hard for guys to comprehend the world of online dating from a woman’s perspective. They then flippantly toss out all of those well thought out, carefully crafted messages from most of those poor schmucks, and then they log onto their Facebook accounts to complain to their girlfriends that there are no “good men” left in the world.
You can’t watch as they smile, and that smile spreads up into their eyes and transforms their face into one of the most beautiful things you’ve ever seen – a thing that warms your heart and makes you realize you want to spend more time with the person. Unfortunately, the reality is nowhere near that fantasy.
They try – and I’m sure most of it is just for marketing. You know, guys get accused a lot of being superficial and basing everything on looks, but I can’t help thinking that most of these women just file quickly through a guy’s photos and then fly right on to the next one without actually getting to know what the guy is like.
RD: Do you have any advice for women out there who use online dating sites and might be reading this? It’s so frustrating, because you know, I think a lot of really nice guys out there could make for amazing boyfriends who would treat these lonely, single women like they deserve to be treated.